The Glorious Return of an Ancient Office Era? No, Thank You.
Ah, cubicles! Those charming little boxes that once dominated the office landscape, providing us with the illusion of privacy and solitude while stifling our souls (until the unfortunate advent of the open office concept). Just when we thought we had escaped their clutches, some corporations are attempting to drag us back into the land of fluorescent lights and recycled air. But fear not, fellow freedom-seekers! In this blog post, we’ll explore why it’s high time to embrace the fully virtual workplace.
A timeless symbol of inspiration…not
Oh, the joy of being confined within the four walls of a cubicle! It’s like living in a shoebox, but without the charm. Who needs natural light, fresh air, or the ability to see other human beings when you can have gray walls and the gentle hum of the office printer as your constant companions? Cubicles truly bring out the creative genius in us all…if by creative genius, you mean an overwhelming urge to nap or count ceiling tiles.
Pajamas and productivity
Let’s face it, one of the perks of the fully virtual work environment is the dress code—or lack thereof. Say goodbye to the days of squeezing into uncomfortable office attire. Embrace the freedom of working in your pajamas, dressing only from the waist up for those video calls. Just remember to mute your microphone before joining the meeting so your cat’s dramatic entrance doesn’t steal the show.
Commuting is a thing of the past…and we’re not complaining
Ah, the joy of rush hour traffic, the serenade of car horns, and the smell of exhaust fumes. Or better yet, being smushed on overcrowded mass transit with your face shoved in some dude’s armpit. Who wouldn’t want to spend their precious time stuck in this mass of humanity, inching along the tracks? With a virtual workplace, commuting becomes a distant memory. You can reclaim those hours of your life, using them to pursue hobbies, spend time with loved ones, or simply catch up on the latest cat videos. It’s a win-win!
Remember the gossip, the passive-aggressive sticky notes, and the relentless competition for the corner cubicle? Virtual work provides a refreshing escape from the intricate web of office politics. Sure, there may be the occasional email misinterpretation or accidentally unmuted microphone, but it’s a small price to pay for the blissful absence of water cooler rumors and awkward elevator encounters.
The kitchen is your oyster
No more waiting in line at the office microwave at lunch. Those 3 minutes waiting for your Lean Cuisine to cook with a line of coworkers staring daggers at your back is beyond unpleasant. If it wasn’t done when those 3 minutes were up? Well, you sucked it up and ate it cold. When you work from home, your kitchen becomes a magical land of delights. Need a coffee break? Simply shuffle to the Keurig, open the fridge to peruse an assortment of snacks, and voila! You’re the master of your culinary destiny, free from the tyranny of the office snack basket.
Covid-19 seemed to spell the end of the cubicle culture and commutes. However, it seems more and more companies are making it mandatory for their employees to show their faces at least some days a week. It’s called a “hybrid” work model. But if you ask me, we’re treading a slippery slope. As corporations grapple with the decision to return employees to the cubicle culture, it’s clear that embracing the fully virtual workplace is the way forward. From escaping the drudgery of cubicle life to relishing the joys of pajama-clad productivity, the benefits are undeniable. So, let’s raise our virtual mugs and toast to a future where work and flexibility coexist harmoniously, sparing us from the melancholy of cubicle confinement. Cheers to the virtual revolution!